Tips for Understanding Your One-Year-Old
I remember the moment I looked at Harper and said, wow, you’re not a baby anymore. It was like she went from baby to toddler overnight. Although she is dependent on me for her needs, she is ready to test the world herself. It has been so exciting to watch her develop into a little person. I will give you 13 helpful tips for understanding your one-year-old.
I feel like she is constantly having an internal battle, torn between security and independence. She wants me to hold her for one minute and then wants to run as fast as she can in the other directions.
Taylor and I always wonder about what Harper is thinking. We know it is on a simpler, uncomplicated level. She physically examines her balls, plastic cups, music toys. She needs to be able to feel and experience everything herself. Her memory is short. She needs to do things, test out new capabilities, over and over again.
One. Understand your toddlers need to experience new things for themselves
Toddlers learn by exploring their environment; so make sure it’s a safe one. I guess I have never grown out of my one-year-old stage. I am the type of person that needs to just up to experience it myself (make plenty of mistakes along the way) in order to learn. I’m sure she will learn to run and fall on her face and learn to ride her bike by crashing into the philodendrons.
A toddler’s interest in learning
Two. A toddler can’t predict what will happen next. It’s important to develop routines that are predictable.
A consistent routine will help your toddlers “body clock”. She will have the ability to nap well and sleep well at night, have regular bowel movements, and exhibit calmness during her downtimes.
A routine is important to
Three. Recognize your one-year-olds need for repetitive experimentation
She drops her cup from her high chair and watches it hit the ground with a big clank. My job is to provide her with a safe environment for her to experiment and explore in her own way. I love watching her experience in the world. Everything is new to her. It is so enjoyable to watch her learn.
Taylor and I try to praise and applause new skills so she can use our approval as a motivator. It amazing when she remembers things you have showed her days or before.
Four. Your toddler will try to intimidate your activities
She will also start repeating things you say. Your grace period is over, watch your mouth.
Five.Your toddler really listens to what you say but not necessarily understand it
My husband and I have conversations throughout the day with our toddler. “Harper, I am feeding Brody (our dog). You are petting Brody” If she says “foo”, I respond-“oh you want to help feed Brody?
Six. Help enhance your toddler’s gross motor skills
There is nothing proven that you can do to get your toddler to walk any sooner. There are no exercises or activities to speed up the gross motor movement. Harper didn’t walk for 14 months and then one weekend, started waddling independently and it is the cutest thing. Hold your little babe as often as you would like. Support her efforts and help build her confidence. She will walk when she is ready to walk.
My toddler’s busy mind has encouraged me to keep a busy mind. I encourage toys to support ger gross motor skills. We have a drum set where she inserts shapes into holes or a turtle that spits out balls and she reinserts in the hole. She loves stacking blocks. Click on my list of gifts for your one-year-old here.
Seven. Your toddler loves learning in his or her own way
My toddler loves to empty containers and fill them back up. She pulls everything out of her toy box and puts all the toys right back. The first complicated movements my toddler learned to do were drink from a cup, brush her teeth (we, of course, help her finish), use a spoon, and brush her hair. She really wants to hold my pens but I easily replace with a crayon.
She loves closing things like the bathroom cabinets and watching items fall on the ground like her quesadilla hitting the floor.
Eight.Remember that most one-year-olds are loud and dramatic. Not just your kid (thank goodness)
Sometimes, my toddler cries and I have no idea what is wrong. She may not even know what is wrong. She may scream because she is sad or mad or can’t reach her favorite toy. Sometimes she screams when she is only a little frustrated. It is my job to respond with comfort when she is truly inconsolable and downplay her outbursts when she is being dramatic.
My toddler is unable (yet) to communicate her needs to me; well not in words, anyway. But she will tell me what she wants through kicking, crying, and the back arch so I can’t pick her up or she will arch to throw herself out of my arms. Do you moms know the back-arch? She will use her entire body to convey her emotions.
I learned that Harper is adventurous. Some toddlers are cautious. When she falls, she gets right back up and stumbles again. She needs to be watched at all times. All of these new skills create huge threats to her safety Go through your home again and childproof the cabinets, electrical outlets. If I can’t see her and she is quiet, she’s probably getting into trouble.
My toddler puts everything in her mouth. As she became more mobile, we needed to safeguard all
Nine. Don’t Minimize Your Child’s Feelings
It’s perfectly normal to want your toddler’s sad to just go away. But it is important for them to be able to express their feelings. When you acknowledge your child’s feelings it helps them learn to cope with them. “Harper, I know you’re sad Pops is going back to Gainesville. I know you love your Pops. Wave goodbye to Pops. We will see him again soon.” By acknowledging her feelings rather than minimizing them, she will be less likely to express her feeling aggressively or turn them inward.
Ten. Hug it Out
It may seem counterintuitive to hug your child that is kicking and screaming, but it actually works. The majority of the time, when I hug Harper, it softens her and helps her feel better faster. Of course, there are scenarios where her tantrums are more physical and it makes sense to give her space; but hugs do help.
Eleven. Be Present
Often, when Harper has a tantrum, it’s because I’m preoccupied. For example, when I’m returning an email or starting a load of laundry, she seems to be more irritated. Sometimes, dropping everything and being present is best to alleviate any tantrum.
Twelve. Not All Toddlers Are The Same
Some one-year-olds are smiling all the time (like ours) some often wear a serious or curious expression, like her cousin, and some seem to scowl. A baby like Harper who is usually smiling is quickly soothed when something distressing happens.
Some one-year-olds have a very short attention span where others can stay engrossed in one activity for 20 minutes. The one-year-old with a short attention span, (like ours) is very curious about the world around her. We find her short attention span easier for you to control her misbehavior by diverting her attention to a more acceptable activity.
There are some one-year-olds who can be very particular to small details, even a small difference that can surprise you. Maybe you change one ingredient or choose to clothe with different fabric. There are others, like ours, whose threshold for sensitivity is much higher.
Thirteen. What Is Typical Toddler Behavior?
It’s important to understand “typical” toddler behavior and misbehavior. It is normal for your toddler to have a quest for independence and to feel overwhelmed by the pressure of independence that she may cling to you. It is normal for your toddler to act rebellious, resistant and assertive.
Your toddler will say no. Your toddler will have a temper tantrum, an expression of anger and frustration expressed by yelling and shrieking. A toddler may have a tantrum if she doesn’t get what she wants, if she gets mad at herself for her inability to communicate or if she’s hungry. She can have a tantrum when it’s time to get in a bath or car seat. It’s important to stay calm and not take the reaction personally. It is normal for your toddler to cling to their parents. It is normal for your toddler to be afraid. It is normal for your toddler to be distressed when you separate.
Baby Center put it perfectly; A temper tantrum is the emotional equivalent of a summer storm – sudden and sometimes fierce. One minute you and your child are in a restaurant enjoying your dinner, the next minute she’s whimpering, whining, and then screaming at the top of her lungs because her straw is bent. Children between the ages of 1 and 3 are especially prone to tantrums.
Remember that you are the adult. Do not negotiate with a screaming toddler or give in to unreasonable demands. If you give in, you are showing your toddler by screaming, she will get what she wants. When the tantrum subsides, discuss in very simple terms, put her feelings into words and remind her you love her.
It’s not about what you tell your children, but how you show them how to live life.
Jada Pinkett Smith
Interested in booking a photography session with Miranda Watkins? Visit her page here.
I’ve linked more of Miranda’s work below:
How to Shoot a Baby Fruit Bath Session
Tips for Introducing Baby & Dog
XOXO
Mackenzie